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>Happy Mothering Sunday .. but spare a thought for those mothers and children who are not together today.

I am delighted and appreciative today that I am spending it my with darling Dominic and my wonderful Mum. She is equally giddy because we are all having a big lunch later at my sisters with new baby Sophie, and my brother Kevin and Brendan are also here. All her chicks together!

But experience has taught me to also be aware that these ‘celebration days’ are not necessarily so for many, in fact they make an existing pain worse. Feelings of loss, isolation and other negative emotions can be even greater.

There will be many today mourning the loss of their mother.

Some will be mourning the loss of a child.

Some will be apart from their children through no fault of their own (see MATCH http://www.matchmothers.org/ for support).

Some may not be together due to living too far away or working or being split between in-laws.

Some may not be together due to a family row (perhaps this is the one to ask, is it worth it? Would it be so hard to pick up the phone and let bygones be bygones?).

Some may be with their new baby but finding it all just too much and have trouble bonding, be suffering from postnatal depression or just exhausted!

If today is more of a negative one for you may I suggest you are good to yourself?
Perhaps contact someone you know who also may not feel like celebrating but just go and have a treat.

Try my theory of appealing to your senses and indulge.

But if it helps, someone is aware that today may be hard for you and is appreciating what they have.

With love,

Elaine Hanzak

www.hanzak.com